Dating Tips for Men: What Is Her Problem?

From where you sit everything looks okay. You more often than not have a blast every time you and your girlfriend get together. The relationship in your opinion is hitting on all cylinders. So it’s understandable that you just don’t get it. You have done everything within your power to please your date and she is still not happy. That’s not to say she is miserable all the time. The two of you are still together. You like her and she has on more than a few occasions expressed her feeling towards you. 

But there are some things men do that really grate on women (no kidding right?). It’s not that these things cause women to end the relationship immediately. They may suffer through it silently, give you some subtle or not so subtle hints as to the nature of the problem or state it outright but for whatever reason it is just not registering with you.  It could be that whole men are from Mars, women are from Venus thing. We have all heard the rumors. 

Still there are a few things you need to be careful about when it comes to your dating relationship.

1. Showing Off

Very few people enjoy being around a braggart. Sure it’s okay to talk about the incredibly good things going on in your life. But many times the conversation can be about what’s going on in her life and yet you still find a way to turn the discussion back towards you.

May be you don’t say much of anything but when you go out, your date catches you strutting like a peacock. You are just too cool for words. Women are very good at noticing things and reading body language is one of them.

2. Chivalry On Life Support

It’s a new era as far as many of us are concerned. If women want to be treated as equals that’s okay with you but it’s not all gravy so they have to learn to take the good with the bad when it comes to equal treatment.

Scores of men miss the point about this. Women have always wanted to be treated as equals but that does not mean you stop treating them like ladies. In quite a few surveys women mention things like opening doors for them, helping them on with their coats or when walking together making sure she walks to the inside. They are such little tidbits that it’s no big deal one way or another. Right?   

Wrong. The fact that women talk about these things means that they are a big deal. Besides if acting like a gentleman can score you bonus points with your girlfriend then do it.

3. You Were Listening. Sort of. 

This is the one that probably does it for women more than showing off and lack of chivalry. Mainly because it sends out a couple of unmistakable signals: One is you have no respect for what she has to say and two, she is really not worth listening to. You may not mean any of those things but that is how it is coming across. If you want to put the future of your relationship in jeopardy then this is the way to do it.

We are who we are and there are some women who hold the flawed notion that they can change the man they are with so as to make him more suitable to their taste. That of course is a blueprint for trouble. But there is nothing wrong with practicing a little humility, good manners and better listening skills. Making her happy by doing the little things can only be to your benefit.

Dating Advice Tip: Why Old Fashion is Better Than Texting

It seem like with the advent of online dating services and social networks that dating has entered an entirely different stratosphere. To a certain degree it has. Now it is possible to meet someone in your neck of the woods instantaneously, have an online chat and decide from the comfort of your own home whether you want to pursue a relationship.

One other innovation also appears to be changing the dating rules.  With the arrival of the Blackberry, it is no longer necessary to pick up the phone to confirm a date you have set up. Now just compose a quick text message, hit send and your date receives your correspondence instantly. In this day and age it’s all about speed.

 These new fangled advancements maybe great for a number of things but sometimes the tried and true methods that worked for previous generations are still the best way to conduct yourself when it comes to dating.

1. Let’s go out

You may be using your Blackberry for all kinds of purposes. Yes it’s turned out to be a very helpful resource but when it comes to asking someone for a date it’s not a good idea. Besides it being somewhat impersonal, it also tells the other person, you have not quite worked up the nerve to pick up the phone and call them or ask them out face to face. Letting the other person see you and hear your voice will easily have a more powerful effect. You may have put a lot of passion into writing your text message but when it gets sent to your potential date it still comes off as cold. 

2. Will they or won’t they

Yes, you can call someone, ask for a date and not get an answer or meet that person face to face and get a non committal response.  At least with these two methods, your instincts and observation skills can let you know pretty much where you stand. In other words you have a clearer indication of whether to keep asking or move on. Texting someone for a date and not getting any type of feedback can having you going in a hundred different directions.

You thought they liked you so why are they not responding? May be for whatever reason they are not available right now. The whole point is because you have not communicated with them in a more direct manner you don’t know so you are left to guess as to what is going on. The mind can play terrible tricks on you when it thinks you have been left hanging.   

3. Sorry but you can’t make it

This one comes under the heading of playing with dynamite. They agreed to go out with you. If you cannot make it then at least give them the courtesy of a phone call or a face to face cancellation. Whether you mean it or not, breaking a date thru texting is a clear indicator you are running away as fast as you can.  If your date is anywhere near the periphery of your social circle, the chances are the word about your rudeness (and fear) will spread very quickly.  How the other person takes the cancellation is up to them but the least you can do is face up to your own actions by looking them in the eye or talking to them over the phone.

No doubt some of these new gadgets are tremendous time savers. They also can help when it comes to instantaneously coordinating the schedules and whereabouts of you and your date. But do not let it take the place of good old fashion manners. Whether you two get together or not a warm voice and body will always be more appreciated than distant words on a mini monitor.